Dirt-Grenades

Jack grinned. The dirt was perfect! Dry enough to hold together in clumps, but also loose enough to explode into clouds of dust on impact. He was going to win this fight! He had challenged his friend Gavin to a dirt-grenade fight and he was playing to win. He checked his slingshot. Then he started to collect dirt-grenades. He looked up. He hadn’t realized that he had gone so far from the fort! Gavin would be here any minute! He dashed towards the fort. When he got to the fort he reached for his slingshot to load it, but it wasn’t there! He saw it lying on the ground, outside the fort! He ran to get it. He dashed back to the fort and, looking over his shoulder, saw Gavin coming around the corner! He loaded his sling and prepared to let loose with every dirt-grenade he had! Then a sight made him stop in his tracks!

Gavin was charging, as he had expected, but he was dressed in his Sunday best! His mom was proud of those clothes and he would get in big trouble with his mother if he got them dirty. So he couldn’t fire a single dirt-grenade at Gavin while Gavin pelted him with them until Jack was covered in a dull brown dust. When the battle was over and it was time for Gavin to go, he was still upset and slouched on the front porch. He glanced at Gavin and saw a smirk of triumph flicker across his face. Then Gavin turned around and said, “Sorry about the way I won. It wasn’t fair.” “It’s all right. I was at fault too. I shouldn’t have been upset at you.” And the two friends forgave each other and had many other, actual, dirt fights.

The End

Daddy’s Grade

The story answers the “5 W’s and H” questions about the picture: 5/5
The story includes a description of the characters and settings: 5/5
The plot progresses naturally and includes a twist: 5/5

The story uses correct capitalization and spelling: 4/5
The story uses correct punctuation, including dialogue: 4/5
The sentences contain complete thoughts and use varying structure: 4/5

Comment: Try to use less exclamation marks and replace them with exclamatory words!!!

Total: 27/30

Once upon a time a little girl named Emmalyn stood with her dog named David. They saw a spiral thing with a hole in the bottom. They stood under the hole and it sucked them up in the space! She wondered how she would ever get back to her mom and dad. Just then kind astronauts let her come into their rocket and promised they would bring her back to her mom and dad. Emmalyn was very thankful. Think of it! Riding with astronauts! She was so excited. As soon as she got back to earth they promised to bring her back as soon as they got directions. Finally they found out how to get to her house. When she got home she thanked the astronaut. The end.